Is our health obsession driven by a fear of death?
In a recent podcast, I interviewed Deb Shapiro author of the book,”Your Body Speaks Your Mind” and I asked her the aforementioned question.
While I normally prepare questions for guests, sometimes things come “off the cuff” and I’ll follow my intuition and ask.
This happened on Deb’s episode and she gave a great answer and confirmed what I thought.
Allow me to share my personal story and it’ll make more sense why I asked the question.
See my story:
Have you ever gotten a call, you didn’t want to get?
The day after Thanksgiving 2005, was one of the days when answering the phone proved to be an out of body experience.
The two weeks prior to the call were spent in my hometown’s local hospital taking care of my mother who was slowly dying from cancer.
I was exhausted and so was my sister as we had split time staying with my mother overnight to assist her during her hospital stay.
My aunt finally convinced us to take a break early one morning, and we both agreed we needed time to relax and would return to the hospital in a few hours.
We left the hospital and no sooner than we pulled into the carport at my mom’s house, my sister’s cellphone rang.
My aunt was on the other end and she told my sister,“your mom passed away”.
For an instance, both of us stood there suspended in time.
The moment seemed surreal.
We got back in the car and returned to the hospital.
Upon entering the hospital room, my eyes focused on my mom lying in the bed lifeless.
My senses were heightened and my emotions were on overload.
I felt two distinct, overwhelming emotions…fear and anger.
Mortality
Growing up, I felt immortal.
Who doesn’t think this when they’re young?
Death visited me twice as my grandparents both passed away in my pre-teen years.
No one ever sat me down and talked to me about dying, but I made the assumption elderly people died.
My mother was in her fifties when she decided to leave the physical plane.
Fifty is hardly elderly, right?
When someone close to you dies, it can be shock or a wake up call.
It was both for me.
While my mom lied in the hospital bed lifeless, I was 35-40 pounds overweight.
I feared I would meet the same fate as my mom.
At 35 years of age, my mortality hit me.
It scared the hell out of me and jump-started my health voyage.
I managed to lose the weight, not the fear.
Fear of Death
Public speaking is listed as the #1 fear.
Fear of death is listed as #2.
Why do we fear talking in front of strangers more than leaving our physical bodies?
I could not tell you but I digress…
My personal fear of death came via religion.
Was I going to heaven or hell?
Is there a heaven or hell?
My fear came from not knowing.
As human beings, we prefer to deal with certainty and as less as possible with mystery.
It all makes complete sense.
What doesn’t make sense is the thought of taking one last breath and everything being over, done, complete.
Is it really death we fear or the uncertainty of not being able to control the experience?
Health Obsession
In the health business, we rarely talk about death.
It is just too damn negative to talk about it.
Our focus is on taking the right vitamin or supplement in hopes it will increase our longevity.
We have an affinity for life and the physical body.
Do we want to stay on the physical plane due to love or fear?
Two opposite states of emotion can’t exist in the same space.
Love can’t exist in a state of fear.
So, are you following your health regimen out of fear or out love?
Most people use vitamins and supplements in an effort to prevent rather than fortify the body.
Society puts a great deal of emphasis on youth and the vitality it provides us.
We spend little time on death and releasing resistance to it.
Death is as natural as life.
Since death is the #2 fear, it makes since people avoid speaking and becoming at peace with it.
It should also make since until you get over your fear of dying you can never fully live.
Health Obsession vs Death Progression
Health is what we experience between life and death.
Bad health either accelerates our passing or good health decelerates it.
Truth is…every soul will taste death.
Some will taste it sooner than others and there’s nothing wrong with it.
I came to this realization several years after coming to grips with my mom’s passing.
I was extremely angry with her for dying.
Why didn’t she stick around longer?
Why didn’t she fight more to stay alive?
It didn’t occur to me until many years later, death is sometimes the soul’s answer to releasing resistance.
My mom was tired and she had fought as much as she wanted to and it was time to release her resistance.
I didn’t want to accept it but in the end I had to because it was her choice.
When you release your resistance to death and accept it, you’ll figure out what it means to live fully in the moment.